I am AMAZING because...
I’ve been upping my mindfulness game this week by implementing a reminder throughout the day with the phrase “I am amazing because...” and filling in the blank with assorted victories, both small and large. I’ll be honest: Sometimes it’s really hard for me to even say “I am amazing”... Forget the because part.
I’m really hard on myself. And with a to-do list a mile long, I often feel inadequate and behind on my goals. I thought I’d share my tribulations with you in case you can relate and learn from my trials. Here’s a snapshot from Monday (like I said, it’s been a long week of reflection!):
Surprisingly, I have been crushing it today.
Got a good night’s sleep (HUGE score for me, since quality sleep is not often my friend
Got out of bed pretty soon after my alarm and sat quietly for my devotional and meditation
Taught a kick-butt HIIT-style workout at 6am
Showered, got dressed, made breakfast, made some magical moments with the fam and got everyone out of the house with everything they needed on time.
Ran errands
Got a workout in
Had a snack (gotta keep the body properly fueled!) and got down to work.
But as I got ready to have lunch, I checked in and noticed I was feeling a little unsuccessful.
There were things I had on my to-do list that I hoped to have gotten done by now. And then the negative self-talk started. “You know you need to get this done.. It’s been waiting for you to do for DAYS… If you don’t do it now, it won’t get done… Did you really have to Polo your friends AGAIN (for the fourth time today!!)?!.. Maybe you should delay lunch so you can get it done, just ignore your grumbling stomach (why are you always hungry?!..)... You are SO not crushing this day..).” It goes on and on.
Thankfully, I soon realized I was headed down a slippery slope (this self-talk would lead to me getting even less done and would totally infect the rest of my pretty awesome day with unnecessary negativity) and stopped myself in my tracks. I took a deep breath and took a moment to reflect on the last 5 days. I got sick in the middle of last week (another blog coming soon!) and ended up in the urgent care on Halloween night with a massive ear ache and awful congestion. I felt terrible. I had a sinus and upper respiratory infection.
It was 8:30pm and I was exhausted. And cranky. And I just wanted my bed. While I my prescription was being filled in the grocery store pharmacy, I decided to go food shopping to save myself the trip the following day. I was in a fog, didn’t have a list or meals planned, but I got it done. Food shopping (even with a list!) for me is like climbing a mountain. It’s not my favorite thing to do. In the days after, I was able to rest, recuperate and then cook a meal for my family on Sunday and meal prep for the week. Climbing that huge mountain while waiting for my prescription saved me time going back to the grocery store, tons of stress, and created time today to start the day on top.
So on Monday, when I took a moment to press pause on the negativity I felt despite getting a lot done that morning, I took a few cleansing breaths to bring my attention to what I was feeling, and most importantly, I reflected on what I had accomplished that morning and in the days before. I realized then I was NOT unsuccessful and things were NOT as my negative self-talk led me to believe. I am AMAZING because even on a tough day last week, I dug deep and got things done.
Every time I rested or prepped even just a little bit in the days since then, I was setting myself up for success on Monday. And I was INDEED crushing it that day. The most important realization: I am amazing because although I am not perfect, I work my a$$ off every single day to be the best I can be for myself and everyone who depends on me.
I’ll be honest - there are days I crush it and there are days I am barely getting by. And friends, I assure you I am not always kind to myself through the ups and downs. But I am a work in progress. I am committed to continuing this journey of realizing how amazing I am and truly believing it one day. I hope you’ll join me and do the same💜
